Hi, I'm Bindi! 🐾 I'm a rescued Old English Sheepdog and I have A LOT of feelings. This is my guide to understanding them — told by me, for you.
Inspired by Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) by Albert Ellis — adapted by one very fluffy dog
Chapter 1 of 8
The Day Everything Went Wrong
🐕🦺 ☁️ 😟
Okay, let me set the scene for you. It was a perfectly normal Tuesday. I'd had my morning egg (liberated from the counter — finders keepers, Mom), my couch spot was warm, and the squirrels were behaving themselves for once.
Then it happened.
Mom said THE WORD.
Bindi: "V-E-T. She spelled it out like I can't READ. I have FEELINGS about this, friend. Big ones. ENORMOUS ones. Feelings the SIZE of my hair. And if you've seen my hair, you know that's a LOT of feelings."
My tail dropped. My ears went flat. I tried to make myself very small behind the ottoman — which is hard when you're basically a walking cloud of fur and anxiety.
But here's the thing I learned that day, and it changed EVERYTHING: It wasn't the vet that made me feel terrible. It was what I THOUGHT about the vet.
Stay with me. This is the most important thing anyone has ever taught me — and I'm going to teach it to YOU. 🐾
The Secret Code of Feelings
That night, Mom sat on the floor with me (my favorite place for important conversations — if you're on the floor, I know you MEAN it). And she told me a secret.
Mom said: "Bindi-bear, feelings don't just HAPPEN to you. They have a secret code. Want to learn it?"
I tilted my head. (That's my best thinking pose. Very distinguished.) Mom drew letters on the foggy window, and my whole world changed:
A Activating Event
What actually happened. Just the facts — no opinions, no drama, no embellishments. (This is HARD for me. I embellish EVERYTHING. One squirrel becomes "a squirrel ARMY.")
My A: "Mom said we're going to the vet." That's it. That's all that happened. Just... words in the air.
B Beliefs
What I THINK about what happened. This is the story I tell myself. The instant interpretation my brain makes. Sometimes it's helpful! Sometimes... it's a tiny bit catastrophic. (Okay, a LOT catastrophic.)
My B: "The vet is TERRIBLE. Something BAD will happen. They'll poke me with THINGS. I'll NEVER be happy again! This is THE END!"
C Consequences (How You Feel + Act)
The emotions and behaviors that follow. What I feel in my body and what I DO because of it. Here's the mind-blowing part: most of us think A causes C. But it's actually B! My BELIEFS create my feelings!
My C: Hiding behind the ottoman. Full-body shaking. Refusing treats. (REFUSING TREATS! If you know me, you know that's the canine equivalent of calling 911.)
Bindi: "Wait wait wait. So... the vet didn't MAKE me scared? My THOUGHTS about the vet made me scared?! That's... actually AMAZING. Because I can't control the vet. But what if — and stay with me here — what if I could control my THOUGHTS?"
My Top 5 Thinking Traps (I Fall Into ALL of Them)
So there was this really smart human named Albert Ellis who studied feelings his ENTIRE life. He figured out that most unhelpful beliefs — the ones that make us feel WAY worse than we need to — fall into patterns. I call them Thinking Traps. And I'm going to be honest with you: I fall into every single one. Multiple times a day. On good days.
🪤 Trap #1: Catastrophizing
"This is THE WORST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED IN THE HISTORY OF THINGS!"
Taking something small-to-medium and inflating it to DISASTER level. I am an EXPERT at this.
Me, catastrophizing: "If I go to the vet I will DEFINITELY get 47 shots and they'll shave ALL my fur and I'll look like a naked mole rat and everyone will LAUGH and I'll have to move to a CAVE."
🪤 Trap #2: Demanding (the "Musts")
"Things MUST be exactly how I want them or THE WORLD IS BROKEN!"
Turning preferences (things I'd LIKE) into rigid demands (things that MUST happen or else).
Me, demanding: "I MUST always be comfortable. It MUST never rain on walk day. Mom MUST feed me cheese 24/7. The universe MUST revolve around my schedule."
🪤 Trap #3: "I Can't Stand It!" (Low Frustration Tolerance)
"I literally CANNOT survive this discomfort for even ONE more second!"
Believing I can't cope — even though, spoiler alert, I've coped with this exact thing 47 times before.
Me, dramatically: "I cannot POSSIBLY survive this car ride." (Narrator voice: She has survived approximately 200 car rides. She will survive this one too.)
🪤 Trap #4: Labeling
"I did one thing wrong so I AM a bad [thing] forever!"
Taking one moment and turning it into your whole identity. Instead of "I did something," it becomes "I AM something."
Me, labeling: "I barked at the mail carrier. I'm a BAD DOG." (I'm not a bad dog. I'm a dog who barked. I'm also a dog who snuggles, who loves babies, who shares her toys. One bark doesn't erase all of that.)
🪤 Trap #5: Fortune Telling
"I can SEE THE FUTURE and it's TERRIBLE!"
Predicting (badly) that something awful will definitely happen — then BELIEVING your prediction like it's already true.
Me, fortune telling: "If I go to the dog park, NO ONE will play with me. I'll be alone FOREVER. I'll be the only dog sitting by herself looking pathetic." (I have literally never been alone at a dog park. Not even for 3 seconds. I'm extremely social.)
D is for Dispute — This Is Your Superpower! 💪
Okay so here's where it gets REALLY good. Ellis didn't just say "hey your thoughts are messing you up, good luck!" He gave us the TOOLS to fight back. And let me tell you — once I learned this, EVERYTHING changed.
D Disputing — Challenge Those Beliefs!
Put your scary thoughts ON TRIAL. Cross-examine them like a lawyer! Are they actually true? Where's the evidence? Would they hold up in Feelings Court? (I just invented Feelings Court. It's a thing now.)
I learned three magic questions. I ask them every time I catch myself in a Thinking Trap:
🔍 Question 1: "Is this ACTUALLY true, or is my brain being dramatic again?"
🔍 Question 2: "What's the EVIDENCE? Like, real evidence. Not feelings. Facts."
🔍 Question 3: "What would I tell my best friend if THEY were thinking this?"
That last one is my favorite. Because I'd NEVER let my friend Maple the corgi believe she's a bad dog just because she barked once. I'd say "Maple! You're AMAZING! One bark doesn't define you!" So... why don't I say that to MYSELF?
Bindi: "Okay. Dispute time. Has the vet ever actually been THE WORST? ...No. Last time they gave me a peanut butter treat and told me I was brave. The vet tech scratched my ears. Mom bought me a puppuccino after. So MAYBE... my brain was adding a tiny bit of extra drama? (A LOT of extra drama. Fine.)"
E is for Effective New Belief 🌟
E Effective New Belief
Replace the trap with something true AND helpful. And listen — this is important — I'm NOT talking about fake positivity. I'm not going to tell myself "The vet is AMAZING and I LOVE needles!" Because that's a lie and my brain knows it's a lie. The new belief has to be REAL.
Here's what I replaced my traps with. Notice they're not fake-happy — they're just... balanced. Realistic. Manageable.
❌ Old Trap: "The vet is TERRIBLE and I'll NEVER survive it and I might DIE!"
✅ New Belief: "The vet isn't my favorite place, but I've been 6 times and I was fine every time. It's uncomfortable, not dangerous. Plus: puppuccino tradition."
❌ Old Trap: "Nobody at the dog park will like me. I'm weird and wrong."
✅ New Belief: "Some dogs might play with me, some might not — just like I don't want to play with EVERY dog I meet. That's normal. I like me, and that's what actually matters."
❌ Old Trap: "I barked at the mail carrier. I'm a BAD DOG and I should feel terrible forever."
✅ New Belief: "I barked. It happened. I can work on it next time. One thing I did doesn't define everything I am. I'm a whole, complex, fluffy masterpiece."
Bindi: "See the difference? I'm not pretending to be HAPPY about the vet. I'm just refusing to be TERRIFIED. There's a whole ocean of feelings between 'this is amazing!' and 'WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!' — and honestly? Most of life happens in that middle part. That's where I'm trying to live now."
Your Turn! Let's Practice Together 🎯
Alright friend, you've got the theory. Now let's PUT IT TO WORK. I'm going to give you some of my real-life situations, and you tell me which Thinking Trap I fell into. Ready? (I believe in you. You're going to nail this.)
Scenario 1: The Thunderstorm ⛈️
So I hear thunder. And my brain IMMEDIATELY says: "The sky is BREAKING OPEN. The house is going to BLOW AWAY. We're all going to float into SPACE and I don't even know how to float!"
Which Thinking Trap am I in?
🎉 YES! I was catastrophizing like a CHAMPION. The thunder is loud — that's real. But the house blowing away? That's my brain adding drama I didn't ask for. My balanced belief: "Thunder is scary but it always passes. The house has survived every storm so far. I'll snuggle on the couch until it's quiet."
Not quite! Look at what I'm doing — I'm taking "loud noise" and turning it into "COMPLETE DESTRUCTION OF EVERYTHING." I'm making it way WORSE than reality. That's catastrophizing! Thunder ≠ the apocalypse. 🌩️→🌤️
Scenario 2: The Dog Park Snub 🐕
Okay so I'm at the dog park, right? I do my best play bow. PERFECT form. And this golden retriever just... walks away. Doesn't even sniff me. And my brain goes: "I'm a TERRIBLE dog. I'm un-sniffable. Nobody will EVER want to be my friend. I should live under a rock."
Which Thinking Trap am I in?
🎉 You got it! I took ONE dog walking away and turned it into "I AM terrible." That's labeling — one moment becoming my whole identity. The balanced version: "That dog wasn't feeling it. Maybe they're tired, or shy, or just ate. There are 12 other dogs here — let me find one who wants to ZOOM!"
Close! But notice how I said "I'm a TERRIBLE dog" — not "this is terrible." I took one experience and made it about WHO I AM. That's labeling! One golden retriever's opinion doesn't define me. I'm still magnificent. 🐾
Scenario 3: Mom Left the House 🚪
Mom picks up her keys. My brain IMMEDIATELY: "She's NEVER coming back. She's leaving FOREVER. I MUST have her here at ALL TIMES. I literally CANNOT survive alone for even ONE SECOND. This is the END of our relationship!"
How many Thinking Traps can you spot? (Pick the MAIN one)
🎉 TRIPLE TRAP — you caught them all! I'm catastrophizing ("never coming back"), demanding ("MUST be here"), AND saying I can't stand it ("cannot survive"). That's my brain pulling out ALL the drama. The balanced version: "Mom always comes back. I've been alone before and I was fine. I'll nap on her pillow — she doesn't need to know about that part." 🛋️
Look more carefully at my meltdown — there are MULTIPLE traps stacked together! "Never coming back" = catastrophizing. "MUST be here" = demanding. "Cannot survive" = can't-stand-it. It's a trap sandwich! 🪤🪤🪤
Not All "Bad" Feelings Are Created Equal
One more thing I learned that blew my fluffy little mind: feelings come in different SIZES. There's a HUGE difference between being annoyed and being FURIOUS — even though both live in the "angry" neighborhood. Check this out:
Mild (Green Zone): Concerned → Annoyed → Disappointed → A little nervous
Medium (Yellow Zone): Worried → Frustrated → Sad → Anxious
Here's the thing: the Green and Yellow zones? Those are NORMAL. Those are just... being alive. The Red Zone isn't wrong either — sometimes things ARE that serious. But my Thinking Traps kept launching me into the Red Zone for Green Zone situations.
Bindi: "When I thought about the vet, my brain jumped STRAIGHT to 'terrified' — full Red Zone. But when I used my ABC tools and disputed my traps, I realized I was actually just... 'nervous.' Green Zone! Nervous is SO much more manageable than terrified. Nervous gets a puppuccino and a belly rub. Terrified hides behind the toilet and cries. I know which one I'd rather be."
The goal isn't to never feel bad. That would make me a robot, not a dog. The goal is to feel the right amount of bad for the situation. Nervous about the vet? Totally normal. Convinced I'm going to die there? That's my brain adding special effects I didn't order. And I can send those special effects BACK.
My Promise to You 🐾
🐕🦺 💛 ✨
I went to the vet that Tuesday. I was nervous — not terrified. (Progress!) I got my checkup. No 47 shots. Just one quick one and I barely felt it because Mom was feeding me peanut butter the whole time. The vet tech told me I was the bravest sheepdog she'd ever met. (I'm sure she says that to everyone but I'm CHOOSING to believe it.)
And yes — I got my puppuccino after. With extra whipped cream. Because I earned it.
Bindi: "Here's what I need you to know, friend. Your feelings are REAL. Every single one of them matters. I'm not here to tell you your feelings are wrong. But I AM here to tell you they're not always telling you the TRUTH."
Bindi: "Sometimes your brain adds special effects. Catastrophizing. Demanding. Fortune telling. Labeling. And those extras make everything feel SO much worse than it needs to. But now you have the tools! A-B-C-D-E. You can catch the traps. You can dispute them. You can find a belief that's true AND helpful."
Bindi: "And listen — you don't have to be PERFECT at this. I still catastrophize during thunderstorms. I still label myself 'bad dog' sometimes when I steal cheese off the counter. But now I KNOW I'm doing it. And knowing? That's the first step. That's the whole game right there."
Bindi: "You've got this. I believe in you. I believe in you more than I believe in the squirrel conspiracy. And that's saying A LOT. 🐾💛"
📋 Bindi's ABC Cheat Sheet (Cut This Out!)
A = What ACTUALLY happened? (Just facts! No drama! Hard for me, I know.)
B = What am I THINKING about it? (Am I in a trap? Which one?)
C = How am I feeling/acting? (Is this Green, Yellow, or Red zone?)
D = Can I DISPUTE this thought? (Is it true? What's the evidence? What would I tell a friend?)
E = What's a more EFFECTIVE belief? (True + helpful. Not fake-happy. REAL.)
🏅 You Did It!
You've completed Bindi's ABCs of Big Feelings! You now know the secret code to understanding — and managing — your emotions.
Remember: You can't always control what happens (A), but you CAN change what you think about it (B), which changes how you feel (C).
About the Psychology: This book is inspired by Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), developed by Dr. Albert Ellis in 1955. REBT is one of the earliest forms of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and has helped millions of people understand and manage their emotions. The ABC model is used by therapists worldwide.
This is an educational story — not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out to a licensed therapist. 💛
